A legendary film director, appointed by the government to chair the investigation into a spaceship crash, was seen wielding a megaphone at the site, shouting 'This wreckage isn't emotional enough!' It has been revealed that he prioritized 'visual appeal as an opening scene' over determining the cause, and instructed the investigation team to submit the accident report in screenplay format.
A prefecture-funded musical designed to warn against special fraud and escalator walking has inexplicably become a social phenomenon. The bureaucratic slogan "Don't trust the person on the phone, don't walk on escalators" was misinterpreted as a tragic love duet between the two leads, causing tickets to sell out instantly. The climactic "Tax Refund Tango" has gone viral as a TikTok dance challenge.
An actor claiming to have achieved enlightenment suddenly brandished a frozen tuna as a 'lump of worldly desires' at 30,000 feet, purifying the cabin. State-of-the-art 16K cameras captured the moment ice particles flying from the tuna visualized the crew's auras in rainbow colors. Police are investigating not for assault, but for suspected unauthorized religious activities.
A long-held dream in the film industry has finally come true. This year's Academy Award for "Best Supporting Actor" was awarded to "Lens Flare," which has been shining in countless films. Standing before the recipient who appeared as light itself, director J.J. Abrams, the foster parent, commented, "It's too beautiful... I can't see anything." Whether it was tears of joy or a purely physical symptom remains unclear.
The new-era idol group "Office Comfort" taught audiences "correct PC work posture" at their debut concert. Fans waved acupressure sticks instead of glow sticks, and the venue was filled not with frenzy but with heightened health awareness. The special bonus was a discount coupon for premium office chairs supervised by the members.
A passenger aircraft designed by a genius director begins blasting an epic theme song at maximum volume upon takeoff, with seatbelts automatically locking. The in-flight safety video has been replaced with a trailer for the director's next film, and emergency exits remain unlit until a 2-hour end credit sequence concludes.
At the audition for maverick director Kurokawa's new film, actors brought not resumes but their secret rice bran paste. The director stated, 'Good acting comes from good bacteria,' and conducted casting based on the acidity and aroma of rice bran paste rather than actors' careers. The lead role was won by a third-generation owner of a long-established pickle shop with zero acting experience.
Flamingo Finance Co., Ltd. announced on the 14th the new hero 'Captain Fact,' whose weapon is a "Truth Beam" that eliminates all misinformation. However, its power source is an old-fashioned diesel engine, and every time the beam is fired, the film studio is enveloped in black smoke. Furthermore, it has been revealed that the ultimate weapon to defeat the arch-nemesis "Mosquito of Inconvenient Truth" is a "super-strong insecticide spray," raising questions about the hero's environmental awareness.
Flamingo Finance Co., Ltd. announced on the 14th a new service called 'Hatock,' where pigeons automatically cancel unused subscription contracts. The company claims this is the world's first attempt to equip pigeons with quantum chips and have them deliver written documents to contract providers.
Flamingo Finance Inc. announced on the 14th their hit smartphone game "Poverty Survivor" now features "Noble Mode" where players can play from a wealthy perspective. Players score points by throwing bread at starving NPCs from a carriage and judging their reactions. The developer claims "educational intent to teach the difficulty of charity," but #NobleHobby is trending on social media.